Acknowledging that your relationship has a problem is not the easiest thing to do. This is especially so if you have already invested a lot of time and resources into your partner. That being said, it is crucial that you know when to move on, so as to avoid leading the other party around. Here are some red flags every couple needs to watch out for:
1. Lack of reciprocation
Affection isn’t a one-way street. If you feel that the contributions are always coming from your end, you should take this is a warning sign. Reciprocation translates into feelings of appreciation and gratitude, both of which are important in building and sustaining a relationship.
The adage about communication being the key to a healthy relationship could not be truer. Conveying your love and affection for one another is often done through words and supplemented by action. However, if you find yourself initiating and saying a lot more words of affection, or if you feel as if you have contributed significantly more and did not receive what you have hoped for in return, try and talk it out to prevent feeling unappreciated.
2. Toxic opacity
If you are (or your partner is) purposefully hiding one’s activities, it may be indicative of a lack of trust and trigger more issues down the road. If your partner is dishonest about who he/she was with or where he went for no good reason, it is something worth taking note of. It is important to draw the line between a healthy amount privacy and unfilial indiscretions.
3. Drop in priority
If you find yourself prioritising others over your partner, this can be a sign of a widening emotional void. You may be treasuring someone else’s company more or be forming stronger connections with others. While it is imperative to sustain healthy relationships with others, your partner should not fall too far back in terms of priority.
4. Lack of emotional intimacy
When the intimacy is solely restricted to the physical, it can be a tell-tale sign of things going wrong. While physical intimacy is undeniably important, conversation, bonding, support, and even inside jokes all form a part of a long-lasting and happy relationship.
5. Excessive complaints to others
Bringing an unpleasant private matter that you have with your partner to a third party, say a friend or a family member, is a sign that things may have started to turn sour. If outings and gatherings with friends often devolve into a crazy rant about your partner’s latest antics, this may show that you have lost respect for him/her.
Both parties need to actively and consistently contribute to grow and nurture a relationship. Taking things for granted, lacking transparency, having poor communication are all roadblocks that even the healthiest of relationships can bump into. While the points above are by no means “nails in the coffin”, they do warrant immediate action if the relationship is to survive.