The upside to being high-maintenance

The upside to being high-maintenance

by Eunice Chua 02 Feb 2020

High-maintenance people win in almost every situation – getting what they want simply by being assertive about their needs. The things is, not everyone has the patience when it comes to dealing with such people because they tend to come off as spoiled prima donnas... but are they really? There’s a difference between a healthy amount self-respect and narcissism; being high-maintenance doesn't necessarily make it all about the latter


When we mention “high maintenance”, we actually refer to people who are vocal about their desires and prioritise their individual needs over others’ opinions of them – that’s actually something to be respected. Why? Because they are presenting themselves as autonomous people who know what they want and will stand up for their rights. The next time someone calls you high-maintenance, smile and say “thank you” because hey, that’s so much better than being labelled spineless or even boring!  


Of course, being an over-pampered diva is taking self-love a step too far. What’s the difference then? High-maintenance is more about being reasonable to yourself and others, in various ways.


1. Being straightforward with your feelings

In other words, be honest and say what you really want! Sometimes this puts people off, but that isn't necessarily a bad thing. In fact, it’s the best thing that could happen because then you’ll save yourself a lot of trouble down the road that would have cropped up if you had kept mum.


2. Not conforming to social pressure

We’ve all experienced situations where we were invited to go somewhere or do something that we weren't really keen on. By directly turning down the invitation, we save ourselves a lot of unnecessary unhappiness and also get to spend our time doing things we actually like.


3. Always looking your best

Personal grooming shouldn’t be an afterthought. Schedule your pedicures, manicures, waxing, etc. and don’t be ashamed to prioritise these over doing other things. You deserve to look and feel your best at all times, because having all that ultra-confidence sure doesn't hurt!


4. Getting all the rest you need

Some experts say you need eight hours of sleep, others say six is sufficient. Forget these. Everyone’s body has different needs, so if you find that you need ten hours of snooze time then go for it. Having adequate rest is important for your well-being and happiness. When you’re in your best form, you're better able to spread the joy to people around you too.


Being high-maintenance doesn't have to be equated to being spoiled or demanding. It can be interpreted as a sign of someone who’s in control of their life and isn’t afraid to be authentic. Authenticity reduces complications in daily life – it takes away pent-up anger, the disappointment of unmet expectations and the unhappiness of living for somebody other than yourself. Think about how many conflicts could be avoided if someone would just be honest about what they want, for once. Start being that person today!